31 Oct Things That Guys Do That Make Them Assholes
JUAN SAYS: We get it, you are single and free to fuck any girl you want, because you choose not to commit for the simple reason that you would just want to take in life as it presents itself and not exactly jump on the commitment bandwagon just because. You may think you are not bothered by being single and available, but we grossly think that there is something wrong with you. Many women think that older men who are not in a committed relationship have issues, and no matter how you present yourself to us, we just would like to stay away from you. You are a complete douche or yeah probably even gay. And no matter how much we want to have you, we would rather accept the later as an explanation for being what you are today than the former. But while we are at it, here is a list of flirting don’ts that some men do that make you an ass in our eyes. Please stop killing the fairytale.
1. ACTING ALOOF ON THE FIRST DATE. So you mustered the courage to ask us out and you are acting cool by showing that you are somewhat uninterested in what we are doing and saying. Sure you want to give us the floor when talking and you are not much of a talker, but we went out with you and we would like to get to know you too. You are not too cool for us. We just want to know if you are worth it.
2. NOT ASKING THE RIGHT QUESTIONS. What is a right question? And what questions should you ask? Anything that would lead us to thinking that you want to get to know us would be fine. Asking us about our sex life, habits or the last guy, girl, vegetable we humped on is not exactly enticing. So avoid this at all cost, coz there will be girls who will know how to answer. And they might just kick your balls with their words.
3. COMPLEMENTING THE WRONG THINGS. We are not out there to fish compliments but surely, we put in a great deal of effort when we go out with you. Please do not complement us about how big our boobs look when we wear that low cut dress, just say we like you to say it subtly. As we age, we want to be complimented on the stuff that matters, not just on our looks. Trust us, WE ALREADY KNOW.
4. BUYING DRINKS INSTEAD OF FOOD. Not every girl is on a NO EATING DIET. We maybe concerned with our bodies but we eat too. We don’t come cheap so don’t bring us to a buy 1 and take all the bucket happy hour. Pick us up at 7, take us to dinner and yes, PAY THE BILL! We may be fighting for gender equality but we do appreciate a little form of chivalry.
5. WAITING TO REACH OUT. So you had a great time? So what’s stopping you from telling us so? You don’t need to wait a few days to let us know that you had a great time with us, we want to know right now! Not texting us doesn’t make us salivate for you even more.
6. EXPECTING THE GIRL TO DO EVERYTHING. Now there lies a problem when guys are playing the game. They would drop hints of wanting to hang out or hook up but expecting the women to say it. Effort is sexy. Saying what you want is effort. Get the drift?Tell us what you want to do, where you wanna go and what time would you be picking us up. That is taking charge. That is effort. That is SEXY.
7. SENDING SEXY SNAPCHATS. The lowest of the low have started to invade the social networking sites messenger sending us photos and videos of their numbers and they think they’d get us hooked with that. Sorry, we send these photos and videos to all our gay friends and let them have the feast. We don’t need to know the size of your dick. We simply don’t. We have seen a penis before and yours doesn’t look any different. So screw you!
8. NOT EXPRESSING YOUR FEELINGS. Showing us how you feel doesn’t make you less of a man. It takes a real man to hold our hand, look us straight in the eyes and utter the words. Appearing vulnerable is power in any relationship. Use it wisely.
9. TALKING ABOUT PAST RELATIONSHIPS. We are your potential girl, not your girl Friday. Period.