16 Aug On Outing Gay People: It was NEVER your story to tell
JUAN SAYS: The triumphs and world records set in the Rio Olympics was clouded by one nosy straight white homophobic reporter who wanted to poke fun at gay Olympians by outing them to the public. This was done without regard for the life and safely of the athletes who are still closeted in their own country.
While the athletes mentioned in the article written about these gay Olympians weren’t Pinoys, the issue of “outing” the gays (be them athletes or not) are not exactly exclusive in the Olympics. This isn’t even a “below the belt issue” confined to small areas outside the Philippines. It is a fact that where there are “out gay people,” there will be closeted gay people, and straight people who should are just in the wings waiting for the opportunity to meddle with other people’s business.
There are reasons why some gay people are still closeted, and these reasons may include life and death situations — their safety and careers rely on their secrecy. Their quality of life, their peace of mind rests on their secrecy. And sadly in the Philippines, there are bullies and there are those who hide behind the guise of “hindi ko alam akala ko out siya” who press the wrong button and expose what isn’t theirs to expose to begin with. Pakialamero ka lang talaga!
Some straight people like to ridicule the LGBTQ, and some gay people would bully closeted people by gossiping about it. How do they know? Naamoy daw nila. Oh eh di kayo na ang may lahing aso. Ah correction, ahas pala, because they smell with their tongues. Wala silang pakialam kasi kung gay ka raw be true to yourself, be proud. Reality check. It’s none of your business.
You cannot shove your values, belief and advocacy down everybody’s throats. That’s not democracy. That’s bullying, manipulation, power tripping and disrespectful. Though generally Filipino culture is very accepting of LGBTQ even if there is no gay civil marriage here, certain subcultures still have bias against them, that’s why it’s often better to be closeted. Like in the US Military, they have a law to protect gay personnel, “don’t ask, don’t tell.” They have their own subculture, and some measures are necessary.
We have a previous article here in Juan.com.ph When Closeted Men Shout Foul!: What the Gay Hidden Minority Has To Say about an interview with out and closeted gay people, who were asked why there is discrimination and cliquish culture even among LGBTQ community. Here is the deal: every person’s sexuality is none of our business. “Uy wala pa siyang asawa or girlfriend? 40 plus na siya ah. Guwapo naman. Baka bading noh?” “Ay malamang tomboy yan, laging gupit lalaki at di man lang nagpapalda or make up. Wala ring boyfried.” ALL GOSSIP.
Their sexuality and their lives is none of our business, much more declaring to the world what they are or what they are not. Same is true with feelings. Same is true with their life decisions. Take this as a warning, the next time you want to declare someone else’s sexuality. IT IS NEVER YOUR STORY TO TELL.